Friday, March 24, 2006

Attention Whoring At Its Finest
or
Why I Respect Nambla Members More Than Bush Supporters


Look at me! Look at me! I'm a jew for jesus!

Look at me! Look at me! I'm a CONSERVATIVE queer

Look at me! Look at me! I'm a bush supporter...

Here's what is wrong with the country. That's right, I figured it all out.

It came to me when I read a review of V for Vendetta written specifically by a man who described himself as a Fox News watching, George Bush voting, moderate conservative from [a] red state.

Then there's the new "super conservative" hired by the
Post that's causing all sorts of controversy.

Then there's Mann Coulter.

All of these people have one thing in common, they love to to call attention to how conservative they are, and here's my bombshell:

I don't think they actually truly believe a word they're saying.

Let me go on a pertinent tangent here: JEWS FOR JESUS. What's up what? The Jews for Jesus people are a bunch of freaks who want to make themselves feel special by joining a little niche club that makes them stand out from all the other religions.

Now let's move on to EXHIBIT B: Log Cabin Republicans, homoqueer conservatives. Have you seen how they dress, how they act, how their ringleader Andrew Sullivan carries on in disarmingly confusing rants?

Being a conservative queer is a whole thing, a community, a special cult if you will, the same as the jews for jesus people. Look at me I'm gay BUT I'm conservative.

Aren't I special?

People become imbroiled in cults because they want to feel part of a cohesive group, they want to feel special and worthwile, and here's my bombshell; the American GOP Bush supporting people in America are all IN A CULT!

That's right, the conservatives are one stop ahead from Scientology, which was easy enough to do since most of them were already into religion, so it was just a matter of a few nudges to get them all to join the feel good conservative cult.

You see, most people look at the GOP and say, "Damn well at least they all have a strong message," and I agree, but they only do so because they're a total cult, everyone speaks with the same voice, and their reward is a sense of mystery and allure to them.

The reason why conservatives, jews for jesus, and the log cabin republicans get less respect from me than people from NAMBLA do is because you and I know that the people who join NAMBLA aren't doing it for the title.

The people who join NAMBLA really REALLY want to have sex with little boys.

If someone is in NAMBLA you better believe that they mean what they fucking say, and at the very least I can latch onto that, as opposed to a log cabin repub that will just sort of stare into space as he talks in a self-congratulatory trance.

Which is why I think its hilarious when people accuse gays of being gay just because its a trend.

To which I reply, "no no, you don't understand, we really REALLY like sucking cock."

Now you see, I've solved America's problems, CONTACT CNN!!

KINK!1
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Notes

I approve of this recent trend: vaguely attractive shaggy haired male comedians who are possibly jewish...I have absolutely no problem with that, thank you.

Oh and I'm back on kvn.blogspot woot!
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