Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Black Tuesday
or
Something Very Important


Well I'm starting to think this whole "black" trend is going to become passe at any moment.

Minority Test Scores Omitted

Students whose tests aren't being counted in required categories also include Hispanics in California who don't speak English well, blacks in the Chicago suburbs, American Indians in the Northwest and special education students in Virginia.

Aha! Notice "hispanics...who don't speak English well," notice the little disclaimer! That means hispanics are the smartest, booyah, take that blacks and the so-called American Indians (and retards).

I say we ship the blacks to the land that begot them....not africa, but Jamaica, billed as the MOST HOMOPHOBIC PLACE ON EARTH, making it a sort of anti-DisneyWorld.

As a side note: seriously...homophobic? Didn't Eddie Murphy base his entire early act on hating gays, then later on in life he got caught fucking around with driving with a transexual? Homophobes be having issues mon.

Blacks...you better watch your back, because the man is damn tired of you taking over February and filling the theaters with your Southern Black Biopics....Ho!

ADDITIONAL COMMENTARY!

Just wanted to get something off my chest here...

Did you notice how particularly boring the internet was this weekend? I mean, last weekend we got Angelina Jolie is being protected by Tigers stories, now it was all tax returns and bullshit (plus I was off busy on my dating adventures that ended in SHIT!)

Fortunately I found a small safe haven for myself in Monitor Duty DC comics profiles particularly the extensive profile on Superman, so having done all this research I feel I'm prepared to answer the age old question:

What would happen if Superman fucked Lois Lane?

The mainstream consensus appears to be that Superman's super sperm would just bust through Lois' organs and burst out behind her back, thus killing her.

BUT, now I have the answer, and it is, "it depends what Superman we're talking about."

Superman from Earth-2 could probably fuck Lois just by looking at her, Superman from Earth-1 appears to have enough control over his musculature that he can alter his voice and move his face so subtly and so rapidly that no one can take a good picture of him, THEREFORE, I hypothesize that Superman from Earth-1 COULD CONCEIVABLY FUCK LOIS AND GENTLY RELEASE HIS SUPER SPERM INTO HER SO AS NOT TO CAUSE FATALITIES OR CRITICAL DAMAGE!

However, I think that Superman would give Lois the fucking of her life, and its also possible that she would pass out with his sperm gurgling up through her throat, but that's the price you pay when you do the Man of Steel.


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Notes

Jamaican based editorial on gay bashings (Scroll down), read it in that retarded accent of theirs for best effect.

Crazy old man from the stone age media irritated over food blogs, but claims he isn't stone aged media biased...or old....or crazy...

Cracking the Insta Novel

Super-stupid poets make up super stupid poetry
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