Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Daughters of Eve
Roommate Woes

Now all this talk about ex-gays, I do have to say that I believe the editor of Venus magazine--Charlene E. Cothran--is really a successful ex-gay.

Why? Because women are deceitful evil creatures borne of Satan himself.

While its virtually impossible for men to switch sexuality due to our testicles and massive amounts of pumped out testosterone--

--Women, being the deceitful harbingers of humanity's doom, can easily switch sexuality. One day you're a lesbian for life, and at 50 you just decide to be straight, and you mean it, harlot.

It was Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve...

Or let me was Adam and...SATAN!!

You catch a gal on an off day and she'll just kill you. Case in point, look at the email I just got from my femme roommate!

So, since I cancelled maid pro, and this [other maid we agreed on] is not available... please be sure to clean the kitchen & bathroom before I arrive home Tuesday night. I should be home by 10PM. Please first dry, then wet swiffer both the bathroom and kitchen floor. Clean the bathroom mirror, clean the base of the toilet and inside the bowl as well as the top . Please make sure the tub is clean as well and if needed switch out the linings.

Did she really just write to me like I was her maid?

I'm trying to be sympathetic because her mother IS suffering from major brain cancer...but guess who's jizzing in your organic milk tonight, bitch?


Democratic presidential hopeful Bill Richardson called someone a faggot in spanish on Don Imus' show. Ouch! Another one bites the dust! Guess he won't be making it to the gay Democratic debates.

Blogging the Three Stigmata of Palmer Eldritch, its my favorite K. Dick book!

Mayor Jim Naugle's funny homophobic comments. He's the mayor of Fort Lauderdale! Its like if the mayor of Detroit complained there were too many blacks hanging out in too many KFCs in the area.

Lady Bird Johnson has died. In other news, everyone on the internet has now visited Lady Bird Johnson's Wikipedia page. No seriously, who the fuck was Lady Bird Johnson?


bagel of everything said...

It is entirely necessary to leave a detailed list in order to have some males clean up after their disgusting stupid selves.
She seems to have neglected to remind you to sanitize the sink. Don't even pretend like you don't piss in it!

GrooveTheory said...

Uh duh! Anne Heche?? Hello.

Deviant said...

I am a disgusting fucker :-p.