Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Bipolarity
or
This Is What Happens To the Unmedicated


I had one of those especially sublime days today where I make contact with as few people as possible.

It usually happens the day after I go out, imbibe moderately, and find myself surrounded by cretins, specifically short girls and weird looking gays...and also mule-faced straights.

Usually--I'll admit--I am a people person, but on some very special days, I want to rip a hole into the space-fabric and watch as all earthly bodies are thrown into the vortex.

I don't know what sort of outward appearance I have, but on these days I must be unapproachable to the max, and I will this so.

Yep, beneath this young boyish exterior lies a seething bubbling hate, I think I got it from my mom.

And its not anything for anyone to be worried about, I think its part of who I am perhaps? Huge life-altering things don't bother me, but small things do, for instance:

Today our company had free food out, and the man placing the free food is a simpleton. He's a baboon moron who might be gay or just slow, who knows? Seriously we all have problems.

I try to get this free food as he's placing it and he says I can't have any! Not yet, because nobody is here.

I have this retard in front of me and my food, and he won't give it up. As a revenge tactic, I take three glasses and plates from the kitchen and place them on my desk, that way when he comes buy to pick them up he'll have several arms full of stuff.

And for the last time...PLEASE for the LAST time, stop telling me how nice it is outside! If someone tells me its nice outside one more time then I will eat their placenta.

3 comments:

Cooper said...

Haha, yay, embrace your inner hate! :)

Kevin said...

I must be good when I'm miserable, non?

David said...

Hey, have you seen how nice it is outside today?