Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Incest Fatigue
or
Getting Locked In A Metaphoric Rape Basement

I apologize for my gross leave of absence due to prolonged catnaps, but there's not much I can do about that.

For the week or so I've been following the Austrian incest rape story on all major news outlets. Now I'm not the sort of knee jerk reactionary that will call for the death penalty on just about any criminal short of jaywalkers--for instance I'm one of the few people who wouldn't wish a person to be anally raped and killed if they molest a girl because I'm not a subhuman ogre--but even I have to pause and ponder how wise it is to let this Austrian guy live.

Maybe we should really just kill the bastard quietly and pretend none of this ever happened. The world might be a better place for it.

Aside from the rape aspect of the story (is it rape if you consent to be forced against your will to be locked in a basement? Think about it) this incident has struck a very strong blow against people in the pro-incest community.

Truth be told, I'm sufferin from incest fatigue, which has come to a head while reading this ABC news story about the latest incest couple.

A half brother/sister? Are you even trying anymore incest community? If it was fine for Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia to make out with each other in Star Wars, then its fine for you to give it to your half-sister of all people, it just reeks slightly of desperation is all.

A lot of people ask me, the bastion of reason, why is it ok for homosexuals to get together and not incest couples? Are they not both consenting couples? Are they not both threats to the survival of man?

And to them I answer, have you SEEN these incest couples? At least homosexuals tend to look attractive together sometimes, they're pretty as parrots whereas incest couples are busted looking. That isn't to say I'm against incest rights specifically, but I am against granting rights to ugly people certainly.

Furthermore, incest couples ALWAYS meet when one of them is 14 and the other is 35, its hardly consensual on any level, and the dementia of agreeing to boff your brother continues well past the age of consent, leading to the "illusion" of consent, but we all know you have to be chained to the metaphorical basement to continue having sex with your family (whereas homosexuals only agree to be chained to a basement as a recreation).

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