Thursday, January 01, 2009

My Trip To Los Angeles
or
I Am Back In New York And I Feel Dead Inside


Los Angeles is like a joke whose punchlines takes too long to get to, you wait and you wait for that something interesting to hit you but it never comes, and once you get it you realize it was rarely worth the wait.

I don't know, but that city makes me bitter. I think it's the parking. The entire concept of parking your car can consume your soul, it really is the greatest thing wrong with our country.

If you're going to go out in LA you have to know where you're going, you have to pick everyone up, you have to figure out who will be driving, and by now you're exhausted, right? But then you have to park...

And this is the point where you start to grind your teeth because the person next to you points out all of these parking spots, and the person behind you says "see, this is why I just take cabs everywhere," and you see an empty spot but there's a sign above the curb that reads "No Parking from 3-8 pm on Saturdays," and the sign directly below that says "No Parking from 9-5 AM on Thursdays and Fridays" and the sign below that says "No Parking Anytime Except On Weekends," and you don't even know what day it is.

This is when I want to turn to the people in the car and say "listen, why don't I just drive you all back, because I'm fast becoming irritated with being here, with you, and parking. Let's just call it a night so I can go home and stare at my mother all day."



I am trained to drink in situations like this, but I'm in a car so I can't drink! It's such a mental city.

-Deviant

4 comments:

chad said...

oh my gawd - you are sooooo DRAMA. I get soo annoyed with al the LA haters. I never worry about parking in LA because i the places worth going to don't really have parking problems and/or you park it at subway station and head into hollywood, silverlake or downtown. Sure the subway doesn't go to weho but really who cares about weho these days - its become irrelevant these days.

Kevin said...

I'm drama like a fox...but listen to yourself! Park at the subway station?! PARK AT THE SUBWAY STATION? I might as well use dialup internet and send out my mail via pony express while I'm at it. (Yeah I don't know what that means either).

LisaPal said...

Heh. Who needs to park? In New Orleans, we have drive-through daiquiri bars, but if you do happen to walk into a place and order a drink, someone will give you a "go-cup" on the way out so you can take your alcoholic beverage with you.

I love my city.

The Blackout Blog said...

God, I'm totally with you, man. LA was fun for a weekend. The weather was cute, but I was glad to get back to the City!